It's been awhile

I mentioned in a previous post that blogging is hard. My original intentions were to post weekly, and I was determined to not become "that page" that went unattended for weeks and months.  But, alas, life has happened and it's been over two months since I last wrote anything here.

Due to reasons that don't really matter to you, I have been spending some time rereading some of my previous posts.  And you know what I learned? I like what I wrote! I was able to reconnect with feelings and emotions. I was able to remember the events as they happened, and when I wrote about them. I reminded myself that I LIKE writing and blogging.  It's it's own sort of therapy for me and provides a type of documentation that I am not getting anywhere else.

When I was younger, before I married, I used to be quite good at writing in a journal, nearly every day. But when my "real life" started (getting married and having kids), my history/record keeping ceased. I may not need to log every moment of every day, but I love recording and then rereading the little blips of life that have helped me to evolve and develop into the woman that I am becoming.

I learned this on accident, because I reread my blog on purpose!

What do you do to record your personal and family history?

Choices are important

One spring morning, while on a run, I noticed a large caterpillar crossing the road.  I was running on the left side of the street, and it was crossing from right to left.  How brave of that caterpillar to have left the safety of his grass and leaves and flowers to trudge across the barren, hot wasteland of the black topped road.  It didn't get run over, or stepped on, and knew where it was heading. (I'm sure his instinct told him exactly where to go...and why)  I thought for a split second about picking him up and "helping' him finish this part of his journey.  Then flashed through my mind the images of stories I've heard how it is actually detrimental to the strength and survival of the creature trying to get where it needs to be, to "help them."  The simple act of me picking up the caterpillar and removing him from his course and then placing him on a new section of a path would have been disorienting to this creature, at best.

 I thought for a second, as I was trudging along, how I would feel if someone came and plucked me up, in mid stride, and placed me on another part of the road further ahead.  Would I feel helped? No! I would have felt gipped out of the effort that I was putting in.  I would have felt a little put out that someone thought they knew better than I about what I could handle.  Just because, to you, I may have looked like I was struggling to get my breath or fighting for every step, doesn't mean that I was not capable of getting myself down the road, thank-you very much!

Awhile later, nearing the end of my run, I saw a man mowing his lawn using a riding mower. "Wouldn't it be fun" I thought, "if I could jump on and ride a little ways with him on that mower?"  Not because I couldn't finish my run, I just thought a ride on that tractor seemed like fun.

I instantly flashed back to that caterpillar.  What was the difference between someone else picking me up and putting me on a different place on the road an me riding on the mower? Both would have relieved me of some effort. One was MY CHOICE.  The other, was not.

How important are the choices that we make?  Is my instinct telling me where to go...and why? Am I following that natural instinct or allowing others to direct my path and influence my choices? I will continue to ponder these questions for a long time.

I learned this on accident, because I thought about that caterpillar on purpose.

A little PSA

Today's post is truly from the heart, and without a lot of forethought. It's a lesson I learned on accident, not particularly happy, not one that I wanted, nor do I want to continue to have in my life; I'm afraid of dogs.  Specifically, dogs not on leashes, away from their homes.
A year ago, while running, I was on a very rural road.  While running IN THE STREET but in front of homes, three little, yappy dogs came toward me.  I ran. They chased me and one of them grabbed my left calf and bit me. It was a decent bite and while I was not punctured by the teeth, skin was broken and deep bruising occurred.  What I didn't expect was that this lingering fear would still be with me.  When a dog is out in their yard, they have every right to bark at me.  I will not enter your space, but that dog better not enter mine.  On several occasions since then I have been chased by loose dogs.  This sends my heart rate into levels so high, its like it's trying to reach to sun!
It's happend twice in my new neighborhood.  These chases were done by dogs, not on leashes, but with their owner.  I'm going to shout so you'll hear me. "YOU MAY THINK YOUR DOG WON'T BITE, BUT I DON'T!"
I don't want to be afraid of your dog.  I really don't.  We even had a "great dog experiment" and owned a dog for four years. However, it seems that, sometimes, dog owners/lovers care more about the freedom and happiness of their dog than the safety of others.  Most dogs are not biters. But from owning a very active black lab, I know that the great game of most dogs is to chase people. It is so fun for them! But, for an innocent person who is running for fitness, or a child riding their bike or walking/playing on the sidewalk, suddenly being chased by a dog is not fun at all.
So, consider this a little PSA: Keep your dog on a leash.  It'll save everyone a little heartache. Your dog won't run to chase me, "accidentally" bite me or someone else, and I won't call animal control on you.

By the way, I did call animal control on the dogs who bit me last year.  They were not up to date on their vaccinations and had to be quarantined for three days.  The dogs were also repeat offenders.  I will feel bad for you if your dog gets taken away, or if you have to pay hundreds of dollars in fines, but I will feel devastated if any HUMAN gets hurt because your dog was not restrained.

Maybe this will be something you can learn on purpose because I was bitten by a dog on accident.

Running into the wind

On a late winter day in February, I went for my morning run. It was a bit dreary; clouds everywhere and the wind was blowing.  I grew up in Utah and there we had an east wind that would blow so strongly. But it always came from the same direction...the east.  I've heard runners tell tales about having the wind at your back to sort of push you along and make your effort easier.  In the South it seems that when the wind blows, it comes from all directions.  So I may be running into the wind and then I turn a corner and I'm still running into the wind.  I may change directions again and, still, into the wind! Thanks, South!  Well, on this blustery day, I wanted to give up.  The wind was blowing any and every way it wanted and I was cold! However, I'm consistent in the fact that when I set out to complete a run, I give it my best.  Even if it's 45 minutes in the cold wind, I will finish!
I don't know exactly when, but maybe 35 minutes into the workout the wind finally took a break and the sun came out.  I felt my attitude change and I suddenly felt like I could run forever! I'm sure the actual air temperature didn't change much but my attitude and perspective surely did.  I realized: when we are experiencing trials, problems and challenges in our life, we tend to feel like the cold wind is blowing and we want to quit. But when the "sun shines" and we are given a break from the extra burdens for awhile, we feel as if we could go on forever.

Many years ago I was boarding an airplane on a rainy, dreary day.  As the plane took off and went higher in altitude we broke through the clouds and darkness and it was a glorious, bright sunny day.  I learned then that it is always a beautiful day somewhere, so I may as well enjoy it, where ever I am.
Problems come, trials exist, stuff happens! If we view these experience through the lens of a sunny day we can endure much, much longer.

I learned this on accident, because I ran in cold wind on purpose.

Inspiration and the amazing box of awesomeness

Inspiration--

1-Supply the inspiration for, fill with revolutionary ideas.

2-Product of creativity and work. A sudden intuition

What inspires you? A piece of artwork? A beautiful song? Nature? Another person? Have you ever thought, and realized, that YOU inspire others?

My daughter is dyslexic and works weekly with a tutor.  One of the tools they use is a spell checker; or, as my daughter calls it, "the amazing box of awesomeness." This device allows my daughter to input letters and insert a question mark when she isn't 100% sure of the spelling.  The device then gives my daughter the correct spelling of the word.  It's pure awesomeness for her.  My daughter told this to her tutor who LOVED it and now refers to the spell checker as "the amazing box of awesomeness" to encourage other kids who struggle with using the spell checker.

I am a runner.  I've been inspired by others which encouraged me to work hard.  I never thought that what I am doing would be a source of inspiration to other people.  During half marathon training, as I would post pics or experiences I had while running, people would tell me that I inspired them to start exercising.  Me?!

In whatever it is you do, people are watching and paying attention. When you do what you do with joy, enthusiasm and positivity, (like the amazing box of awesomeness) you will inspire someone else, and they will improve and inspire someone.  It's part of the fantastic circle of life. 

What does your amazing box of awesomeness look like?

Uplifting, spiritual thoughts

Twice a year, in April and October, I am uplifted and fed spiritually by leaders from my church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.  I love these weekends because I am gifted so much enlightenment, such as:

"Families are the best way to teach and pass on moral virtues."
"The best technology cannot be a substitute for revelation."
"Knowledge does not reduce pain."
"Repentance is not a punishment, it is a PRIVILEGE!"
"The happiness of our spouse is more important than our own pleasures."
"Children are great imitators.  Give them something great to imitate."
"Fear rarely has the power to change our hearts."
"God will always bless us for our loyalty, but rarely shows us his timetable."
"Those that are the hardest to love need love the most."

I learned these nuggets, and many more, on accident. Because I listened to General Conference on purpose.

*If you would like to watch any or all of the messages, you may do so by clicking here.

Heart full of friends

moving stinks. Really, it is not the most fun I've ever had. The effort to pack and clean is just, well, exhausting. Then there is the emotional roller coaster--happy for new adventures, sad to leave friends, excited for the new house, crying because you listened to that song that reminds you of where you've been living.
People don't like saying "goodbye". It feels final, as if you will never see the person again. We say "good bye" when we hang up the phone. Why is it so much harder when we move? No idea.

While all of this moving and change can be hard physically, emotionally and sentimentally, it helps me to see how blessed I am in my life. I have lived in beautiful places. I have met many wonderful people. The thing that I do love about moving is that it means I get to collect more friends. I love bringing people into my circle, and I love been pulled into theirs. I adore crossing paths with someone in this life, even if our paths have only crossed for a few months. Knowing these people makes my life richer and happier. And my heart is full!

There is  a saying that goes something like, "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."  My kids and I recently completed an over 2,000 mile drive across this country. We attended our new congregation on Sunday and I realized that these are new people that will be brought into my circle and I will be brought into theirs. My life's path will begin new crossroads and a new chapter is being written. And my heart is full!

Moving may not be the most fun because of the work involved, but it is the best way to fill your heart full of friends.

I learned this on accident, because I chose to have a positive attitude about moving, on purpose.

Running is my therapy

Changes in life can bring a lot of stress.  They also can be a time of reflection. Our family is undergoing changes which are bringing a bit of both.

My husband took a new job in a new state and that has left me and three kids to sell a house and prepare to move over 2,000 miles away.  That can be stressful.  We've lived in our current home and area only 18 months; pretty short on the home-owner scale. During those 18 months we've had a love/hate relationship with the home and area. We didn't want to leave our previous home of nine years, the home we have been living in was configured so differently, it took months to adjust. It took longer than we would have liked to make friends and build relationships here.

Have I mentioned that change does not come easily to me? When I felt that this move was going to happen, my first instinct was to reject it and "brace for impact." I talked to a dear friend who told me that I could choose to embrace change. If the change is going to happen, then I can choose how I respond to it.

Some people don't like to listen to music when they run. They say they like the time to think and have their head clear.  Me? I do my deeper thinking and pondering when I'm listening to good music.  The words pouring directly into my head seem to have more meaning.  A song I can sing the words to, without thinking, suddenly takes on a new message when I am concentrating on those words and the story behind it.  Usually during a run I do not listen to music or anything. However, when I'm going to be gone longer than an hour, the earbuds go in and the music goes on.  My music of choice is a mixture of 80's, country and Christian. Ecclectic!

On this particular run I was thinking about the upcoming move and reflecting on the experiences we've had here.  We had lived here about a year when my husband and I felt that change was in the air and it was time to look for a new job move closer to family. It wasn't long after that decision was made that I started to really fall in love with where I live; the house, the neighborhood, the people, everything. About 45 minutes into the run, I hear the words, "It must have been love. But it's all over now." Tears. "It must have been good, but I lost it somehow." Sobbing. I wondered if I had wasted 12 months of living here by not loving it sooner. Then I realized that I had grown to love something and I know we are always better off for loving...even if it takes longer than expected.

Two songs later, Garth Brooks begins crooning to me. "I'll never reach my destination, if I never try..." "Don't you sit upon the shoreline and say you're satisfied but choose to chance the rapids and dare to dance the tide...There's bound to be rough waters and I know I'll take some falls. With the good Lord as my captain I can make it through them all."  Now I was REALLY crying. I thought about how my husband and I really have embraced this move.  We chose what job we wanted, we chose where we wanted to move to. We were dreamers!

The final 10 minutes of my run I stopped the music and took out the ear buds. I listened to the birds singing.  I noticed the leaves starting to bud on the trees and I avoided puddles left from the recent rain. I reflected on how much I have loved where I live, and how grateful I was to have spent 75 minutes saying "goodbye" to this neighborhood and part of the country that has been my home.

Running was therapy for me on this day, and running with music was inspirational and healing to my soul.  I learned this on accident, because I listened to music on purpose.

Blogging is hard

Everyone, it seems, has a blog these days.  I never aspired to be a blogger.  I've never really considered myself a writer. I've had experiences in my life that I enjoy talking about, and writing them down helps to cement them in my memory.
But choosing to be a BLOGGER, now that feels like pressure and that I better be funny and smart and clever. And punctual.  My original intention was to publish one new post a week.  I did well the first month because I wrote several posts on one day and I scheduled them to publish on the weeks that I wanted them.  (I love technology for this purpose!)
Then, life started happening, I got behind on my posts, I began to wonder if anyone was really reading, and thinking that no one would notice if I didn't write another word.  It's challenging to put my thoughts into words that are coherent and flowing for someone else who isn't in my brain.

And I realized, blogging is HARD. I learned this on accident because I choose to blog on purpose.

Put the SOCIAL back into social network

Today's happy accident is brought to you by...my birthday; And social media. Social networks these days are a funny mix of political posts and food videos.  Maybe they should be renamed "opinion networks."

First, I want to share some definitions that I found for the word "social":
relating to, devoted to, or characterized by friendly companionship or relations:
seeking or enjoying the companionship of others; friendly; sociable;
living or disposed to live in companionship with others or in a community, rather than  in isolation:
The last one I really like. People need other people! While many of us feel anti-social at times, we really do need other people to be part of our lives, to at least a small degree.

I had a birthday last week. I'm not ashamed to tell you that I celebrated the completion of my 46th trip around the sun. (sounds kind of impressive, right?) I also share a birthday with my youngest child, a boy. He turned 12.This child of mine does not yet belong to any "opinion networks". He has an email account. He's 12. He doesn't even NEED email but it keeps him in touch with some long distance friends.  Which brings me to my point.  Social networks are supposed to be social!

Because of my said birthday, I was the recipient of many thoughtful birthday wishes. Now, some people don't like to post their birthday on social media, and they don't like receiving the "obligatory" "Happy Birthday" from people that maybe wouldn't ordinarily go out of their way to give a birthday wish. I am not one of those people.  While I don't always give a birthday shout out to someone when I am "reminded", I loved reading the posts from friends who took time out of their day to type out a little birthday wish to me.  It might seem like no big deal, but they really did think about me! They saw that it was my birthday, made a choice to click on my name, continued with that choice and wrote "Happy Birthday, Gina!" or some other variation on that theme.  And it really means a lot! Really. I wanted to reply to each one, so I took some time to do that.  And I wanted each reply to be special too--not a cut and paste job.  And here is when the magic happened.  As I replied, my friends started to reply back. And we were, get this, social! We exchanged niceties and I felt connected to them. Some of these people I have not seen for well over 15 years. It took me a couple of hours to get all of the replies done, but as a new comment would come in I would smile and enjoy a few more minutes with that person. Over the years, social media has been hijacked into political messages, political correctness, business promoting and cat videos. I believe that social media has a great power to bring people together and even to keep them connected, if that power is used for that purpose. Something I learned on accident, because I chose to be social on purpose.

I invite you to take a few minutes today and be social on your social media. Interact with someone. Write them a hello, or wish someone a happy birthday.  It'll bring a smile to you and your network.

Me and the birthday boy trying this selfie thing. 

It's the response that counts

What kind of trials do you experience? Maybe it's an unhealthy habit that plagues you. Perhaps someone you know is dealing with an addiction and it's poisoning your relationship. Maybe it's unemployment or underemployment.  You might be dealing with chronically ill children or aging parents.  Maybe a loved one has hurt you deeply, or you are having a faith crisis, or you are moving  Maybe you face depression.  Maybe it's a trial of how to get your business going, and keep it going.  Maybe your hard trial for today is getting the laundry and dishes done, or making sure that all of the people that live in your house are fed, clothed and safely back in bed at the end of the day.

Whatever we face, whatever our challenge is, it's not really the challenge, or "the trial" that's the issue.  IT'S HOW WE RESPOND to the trial.  Do we meet each hurdle and obstacle with frustration, anger and resentment? Or, do we embrace it as an opportunity to learn, grow and an acknowledgement that we have been entrusted with the responsibility to see ourselves through to the other side of this hurdle?

Getting through these trial usually requires some sort of plan, right? How will I get that laundry done? When will I make dinner? How can I show my loved one that I care for them? How can I loose excess weight or tone and strengthen muscles?

If we respond to these trials with the attitude that we are stronger than we think, and that we can overcome; if we stay on "THE PLAN", there will come a day that we become what we are striving to become, and accomplish.  We are meant to have JOY in our lives.  There is a scripture I love that says "If thou art sorrowful, call on the Lord thy God...that your soul may be joyful." Focusing on joy brings peace into our lives. Focus on Joy.  It's the response that counts!

I learned this on accident, because I want to be joyful on purpose!

No Less Seviceable

Do you find yourself comparing your actions to those of others? Do you feel that your day to day, run of the mill tasks just don't measure up to those of Fred and Sally that live on the other side of the fence? (Or the other side of social media?)

During a church lesson recently I learned that even my daily events like dishes, cleaning, teaching my children right and wrong and supporting my husband do not make me any less serviceable than the actions of those people that, on a daily basis, enforce laws, help the sick, or make million dollar deals.  Our tasks are different.  Our responsibilities in this world are not comparable, but the effect we can have on the world is the same...positive.

A wise man once said, "Not all of us are going to be...catching the acclaim of our colleagues all day every day.  Most of us will be quiet, relatively unknown folks who come and go and do our work without fanfare.  To those of you who may find that (thought) lonely or frightening or just spectacular, I say, you are "no less serviceable" than the most spectacular of your associates.  You, too, are part of God's army." --Howard W. Hunter


No less serviceable.  Something I learned on accident, because I went to church on purpose.

Don't "should" on yourself

I don't feel much like writing today.  No particular reason; the house is quiet, I have had several hours to myself to mostly think. I believe that is where the problem is coming from. I am beginning to feel like I am wasting time, yet there are things that I "should" be doing--
making my bed
fixing dinner for my boys
looking at homes to buy in our new state
reading scriptures
cleaning my bathroom
washing the dishes
writing to my daughter
planning an imaginary trip to the beach

I find writing to be therapeutic.  It helps me to put things into perspective.  All of this "should be" reminds me of a conversation that I had with a friend therapist a few months ago. She works with adults working through Aspergers and/or other social disabilities.  She told me that she often tells them "don't should on yourself." (and, yes...it sounds an awful lot like another bad word) When we tell ourselves that we "should" do something, that thing then becomes a burden. When we pile up a whole bunch of those "shoulds" we end up with a big case of overwhelm and feeling less than we ought.
Instead, my friend, counsels these fine young adults to make a list of what they COULD do. Then they see how many choices they have. That, my friends, is power in action. Power to choose, to be free, to become!

So today, I had lots of possibilities of ways to spend my time. (see my list above.) Instead of any of those, I chose to watch a youtube video, play scramble with friends, read a magazine article and listen to music. Also, I went on a 5 mile run earlier in the day, and that felt really amazing!

I prefer to turn my "shoulds" into "coulds." It helps me to see how much control I really do have over my life. 

So, write a list of things you COULD do today. Then, don't "should" on yourself. Take ownership of every choice you make and see if your day is a little more happy and joyful.  Because you made the choice!

I learned this on accident, because I wrote this blog post on purpose!  : )

Mental toughness, baby!

What is the hardest thing you have ever done? I could list so may things that I have NOT gone through; cancer, death of a loved one, abuse of any kind. 
I am a mom, a wife, a daughter, a sister, an aunt and friend. As I fulfill these many roles, I often feel bogged down by all of the things I have to do, don't have time for, and never get done. After awhile, all of these demands begin to cause me to feel weak; that I cannot accomplish much, that I must be a failure. 
These, of course, are lies. However it took running generally, and half marathon training specifically, to help me realize that I am stronger than I thought. 
I have never considered myself an athlete. Running? I NEVER considered myself a runner. But I was persistent, consistent, and followed the plan. Half marathon training is challenging. The workouts range from 3 miles, to upwards of 12 or 13, depending on the plan. I would look at the long run for the coming week and think, "Seven miles?! How am I going to run seven miles?"  Then the next week.  "NINE?!?" This went on for over 12 weeks. Each week, I finished the assigned run. Some took longer than others. Each time I ran a new "longest distance ever," I felt wiped out for the rest of the day. Physically exhausted. After awhile, the long run was eleven miles, and a weekday run was six.  Suddenly, six miles seemed like no big deal. "Six miles? I can do that, no problem. "
All of these runs were changing me mentally and emotionally. I was realizing that things that used to be perceived has hard were becoming way more manageable. 
The end of my training cycle, I ran 13.1 miles on a beautiful spring day in May; Mothers Day weekend. I finished with my husband and kids around me. And I realized...I'm stronger than I thought  was. 
All of the little day to day tasks that used to get me down were now insignificant in the light that I had just run, and finished, a Half Marathon! It didn't matter how fast or how slow I was. I finished the distance, something that I thought just two years before, would be unheard of for me; if not impossible. 
I am mentally tougher than I thought. 
A lesson that I learned on accident, because I am a runner on purpose. 

Goal vs. intention

Are you a goal setter? You know, one of those people who make New Years resolutions, maybe not with the intention to break it, but with big, big plans to do huge, amazing things. "I'm going to loose 25 pounds before Valentine's Day!" " I'm going to send birthday cards to all of my extended family." "I'm going to exercise six days a week ." 
--a year without sugar
--a year without carbs
--catching up on scrap booking
--organize those photos,
--plan the menus for the entire month. 

I am not one of these people. 
Goal setting; not really my thing. I think maybe I'm afraid of commitment. Or maybe I'm afraid of letting myself down, or someone else, or both!

Running opened me up to a whole new world of goal setting. It started with my desire to run a half marathon, which came from training for a 10K, which came from running a few 5Ks in order to get back not shape. 
I never had a "goal" to run a half marathon. Well, not much before I decided to run it. 
During training runs I would occasionally listen to a podcast. One specifically talked about goal setting. I almost didn't listen to it; two women talking about running and goals and how they are a good thing? Yea, right. 
Well, as they talked in my ears, they said how setting a goal is a good thing. It gives us something to work towards. The goal can be simple, "smile more today...run to the next mailbox...give someone a compliment". I also learned that adjusting the goal is totally acceptable. For example--
When
--Goal A is to run 5 miles. BUT, you didn't sleep much the night before and you feel really, really tired.
--Goal B is to run 3 miles because that's the usual minimum. However, legs feel like led and your head is swimming with all of the "have to's" waiting for you later.
--Goal C is to run to the next mailbox and then just go home because sleep didn't happen and nice mommy needs to exist.

Recently, I learned a new word in relation to goal setting: intention. Setting an intention seems much nicer to me. I intend to do many things, but I am less hard on myself when I do not fully accomplish what I set out to do. This does not mean that I accept failure or quitting, it simply means that I intend to do things, and they will get done.  Sort of a softer deadline or feeling. I like it.

Overall, I now know that setting a goal is good, achieving it is better. Adjusting the goal is totally acceptable.
--the goal can be something as simple as, "smile more today."

This, I learned on accident because I listened to a podcast on purpose.

I am stronger than I thought

I began running at the age of 40.  I felt inspired by two things. 1-A reality tv show about weight loss and 2-A friend of mine who is an avid runner.

In my faith, we practice something called “The Word of Wisdom.”  It is a health code that I agree to abide by: no tobacco, no alcohol use, no recreational drug use, plenty of fruits and veggies and grains, limited amounts of meat.  (I have no problem from abstaining from drugs and alcohol. Limiting meat is a problem sometimes.  :/  )  After giving birth to six children in 13 years my body was starting to feel the effects.  Tired all of the time, feeling heavy, low motivation, low-just-about-everything else.  But in watching the tv show—full of AVERAGE people that needed to lose weight, I began to feel like “If they can do it, I can do it.”  After all, they were A LOT heavier than I was.  So, I started to exercise.  30 minutes a day, three days a week.  THAT. WAS. IT.  I knew that I could work hard, but for a limited amount of time.  I gave myself 30 minutes and when that time was complete, I was DONE.  No, “just one more time” from me.

 I enjoyed keeping in touch with my long distance friend who was developing herself into a very talented endurance, long distance runner-- Marathons, baby!! Something clicked in my brain and I started to think, “If she can do that, so can I.”  Now, this is where I need to explain something.  My friend is about 5’4” and probably weighs 120 lbs. (If even) I am over 5’9” and, at the time, weighed over 190 lbs.  Running did not come naturally to me.  But, due to not wanting to pay for a gym membership, I decided to use what was available to me…the road outside my front door.  So I started “running.”  It probably didn’t look much like running then.  My part of the neighborhood looked a bit like a capital A, the bottom parts of the letter are culdesacs.  I lived on the street in the middle of the A.  So, when I crossed the street, I could run around the “block”, if you will, and come right back to my house.  My neighborhood was also hilly, so, in order to get the the “point” of the A, it is uphill slightly.  I would walk the uphills, and run the flat parts.  I would do that 4-6 times during a workout, 1-2 days a week.  (Did I even mention that my footwear at the time was a knock-off brand of “Crocs?”)

I kept up this cycle of following along with exercise videos (that I happily checked out from the library,) and “running,” for several months.  I began to notice changes in my body and changes in my attitude.  I decided that I could run a 5K (that’s 3.1 miles if you are not yet a runner.)  And, when you are not a runner, 3.1 miles seems like A REALLY LONG WAY TO RUN.  I practiced by running for 60 seconds, then walking for 90 seconds for a total of about 25 minutes.  (Remember, I was willing to work out for 30 minutes total.)  All of this training started in January and I quickly thought that I was ready to run my first “real” 5K.  I signed up for one of those races where they throw powdered color on you every 1K. Race day came and I was excited! By the end of the course, I was a very colorful mess and I felt very accomplished that I had covered the full distance.  After that initial 5K, I decided that I wanted to do another one, so I trained a bit harder.  Soon, I noticed that my workouts were lasting 40-50 minutes…and I liked it!

Training for 5K’s got me wondering…”could I do a 10K?”  (6.2 miles)  During the summer of 2013 I kept up with my running, covering about 3 miles each run, 2-3 days a week.  Then I found a program to help me with covering a longer distance.  During the training for the 10K, I started wondering if I could handle a half marathon. (13.1 miles)  It felt satisfying to train for longer distances and for each workout, whether it was a run or a DVD workout.  It felt rewarding to run farther and longer than I ever thought I could.  Each time I exercised I felt satisfied and energized.  I knew that I was doing hard things—physically and mentally—and I liked it!  One day I noticed ab muscles that I didn’t know I had.  Another day I noticed bicep muscles that actually had definition.  And one afternoon, I decided that it really was time for me to tackle the distance of a half marathon.  I loved knowing that I could do hard things. And I realized—I am stronger than I ever thought.  Stronger in my body because muscles were being toned and tightened.  I could run farther and longer and each new “longest ever distance” was amazing to me.  I was stronger in my mind as I realized that most of the difficulties of doing new things came from my own negative thoughts.  “It’s too hard!” … “I can’t run that far or that fast!”... “My body doesn’t look like that.”…  These negative thoughts can keep us from accomplishing amazing things.  Realize that you are stronger than all of that, and adopt this mantra that I picked up; “Don’t think, just go.” That’s it.  Don’t think too much about it…whatever it is.   You’ll talk yourself out of it.  Don’t think.   Just go! I'm stronger than I thought (and so are you). Something I learned on accident, because I exercised on purpose.

Introduction...

Twenty five years ago (in 1991) I chose to get married. A year after that, our first child was born.  Throughout the next 15 years we would have a total of six children; three girls and three boys (not in that order). One day, in October of 2004, I chose to video my two "babies" after I had discovered them "creating art" with peanut butter. I chose to send the video, via email, to my family and friends. Several  years later, I chose to put the video on FaceBook. Approximatly six years after that, what I didn't choose, was for that video to go viral. I didn't realize that thousands of people all over the world would see that video--And it makes them smile. I have learned so many lessons through this experience, as well as through other things completely unrelated to "Peanut Butter Baby." I've realized that those learning opportunities exist in nearly every thing we do. The purpose of this blog is to help you to see the "happy accidents" in your own life. I'll use stories of things that I have gone through and learned to illustrate how we learn things on accident, because of other things we do on purpose. It's a joyful journey, and I'm glad you are here.

Above Average

This blog has been in my brain for months.  It has been years in the making, but I didn't know it. I've never aspired to be a writer. I don't really try to make people laugh, but I like it when it happens.  Well, because I actually said something funny, not just because people are laughing AT me.  You get the idea.
I really consider myself a pretty average person. Let me explain:

Who am I?  I am a mom, a wife, a daughter, a sister, a friend.  I am a runner, a scripture reader, a cookie baker, a cinnamon roll seller.  I grew up in a small town, went to college, met a boy, got married, had kids and, now what?  I have spent a lot of my life feeling like I am just very, well, average. I have noticed that there seems to be plenty available for those who are wealthy, and for those who are very poor.  Let me explain:  As a young married woman, I began a short career in a direct selling company.  I enjoyed that experience, but quickly realized that it wasn’t as easy as it seemed.  I went to a convention one year and felt very frustrated that those women in the company who were recognized as “directors” or “gem level” associates were given free hotel rooms, free catalogs, free business supplies, etc.  I remember talking to someone about this once and wondering why those things were not shared with some of us who really “needed” it.  

On a separate occasion, at Christmas time, I was watching the news and there was this story about children who were getting a “trip to the  North Pole.”  They were taken to a local airport, put on a plane, and I believe the plane drove from one terminal to another.  When the kids de-planed they were now in “The North Pole” and Santa and gifts were awaiting them.  My kids were young, and we were poor college students.  I remember thinking something like, “Why do the poor kids get such cool activities?”  I felt a bit jealous that such privileges were available to those who were wealthier, (they had worked very hard to achieve their status in the company), and that these kids were going to get a nicer Christmas than my own kids. (It was probably the only REALLY nice Christmas many of those children ever received, while my kids have had several wonderful Christmas/holiday experiences.) 

What I was experiencing then is the feeling of being average.  Just a stuck in the middle sort of feeling, where everything else is just out of reach.  I am not a psychologist, but I suppose some of this comes from the fact that I am a youngest child.  I benefited from having older parents who had more time and more money. I didn't struggle much for want of anything.  Now that I’m older, and so much wiser, I am grateful that I had these experiences.  I have realized that most of us are average.  Just every day people that go around doing our thing:  Dishes, laundry, planning/making dinner, grocery shopping, school, helping kids with homework, chores, taking them to practices, lessons, fulfilling responsibilities at church, on the PTA, HOA board, walking the dog, changing diapers, cleaning up messes, vacuuming, dusting, more laundry, playing with the kids, spending time with your spouse…and the list goes on.  But don’t you see?  This is what makes us ABOVE AVERAGE!  These are the things that make us the wonderful women, sisters, mothers, friends, etc., that we are.

In my earlier list of items that describe who I am, I failed to mention that I am a copy-cat.  Really.  Nothing that I have to say is completely original.  I learn from others, and I am pretty good at reproducing something when I see a great idea.  (Well, unless it is a sewing project.  Sewing and I are not friends.)  So if I don’t have anything “new” to offer you, why should you continue reading?  Because I am able to give you so many of the things that I have learned, and put them into one place.  Many of these thoughts and lessons have come to me as I have adopted running as a new hobby/sport/way of life.  Many more have come as I have lived my life, doing the many "mom" things that I do.
These are the things that I learn on accident, because I live my life on purpose.